moving on

ro told me in an email months ago to “be still” and listen to my heart.  after that I began journaling on-line privately that know one has access too.. only b/c of my MS .. my handwriting is horrible, I also have begun an outline of lisa and my life – our life and the tragedy of how it all changed in one moment. Remember we don’t remember days – we only remember moments.  I believe that to my core.

RO on her blog is also moving on with less blogs.  i believe it’s a cycle when it comes to being vulnerable to all.  I will always do movies b/c to me they mean SO much more than I can ever type and if you think I pick the music by happenstance you are wrong.. there is meaning in all the songs I pick.  I’m not saying i’m leaving my blog too, but if you wondered why I don’t upkeep both, this is why – introspection is what I strive for right now.  personal writings that who knows someday maybe be a book for you all to read my vulnerabilities but more importantly the LOVE that lisa and I shared for each other for nearly 18 years.   Peace to all and I leave you with Rosie’s blog post today

be still

12.08.08 at 1:00 am in family 

watching ruby on the style network 
she moves me so 
her grace and dignity 
her tiny tears

its the only reality show 
that feels close 2 reality 
i wish i knew her
in real life

the academy screeners are arriving 
“it’s the most wonderful time of the year”
slumdog millionaire – just amazing 
what doesnt kill you – brilliant 

the MARAVEL arts center 
opens this week 
years in the making 
 dreams do comes true 

we teach the kids 

the front page will take u 2 RBK first 
4 a while 
as focus is important 
1 must prioritize

blake is now nine 
toothless vivi six 
its hard 2 believe 
yet here we all r 

emerge gently 
into the truths of ur own life 
go out and live it for real
not on line 

know what is 4 u only
not the world 
participate in – not present to
thats the goal 

b4 this blog i kept a journal 
this morning i bought a new one 
there is stuff waiting to be scribbled 
on clean white paper

thoughts feelings 
wishes dreams 
triumphs and failures

4 me alone 
the lesson i am learning
see what comes 
when u look inside u 

4 u – by u 
without an audience 
child be still

its ok
only love 

One thought on “moving on

  1. autumn

    thats deep. how does one even begin to “be still” and listen there heart. i know i would be incapable of it. but, if i could, i would do it all the time. isnt ro you know. like those are the only words you can say sum it up. just wow.

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