13 years

Time was fast approaching for the little boy “michael” to join his forever family

we were beyond excited to have a child to call us mom and “other” mom

it was 13 years ago this week in 1996 – we would celebrate Lisa’s 29th birthday, we would adopt our little guy Michael

and we would celebrate 5 years since our Holy Union

what a wonderful week – Lisa’s Mom and Dad without fail came from Connecticut to Michael’s adoption and to see the adoption of 3 more grandchildren for them

(as well as Grandpa – baptistizing all the children in our family’s faith the day before their adoption)

So thirteen years later – I’m fighting the darkness that wants to swallow my soul in one gulp

our little Michael lives in 24/7 adult care and gained over 150lbs in state care and rarely looks like the handsome guy we raised

there is no 8 inch round Wagner’s bakery cake with butter cream frosting to buy this week – with lots of pastel flowers – just for my love

and no more anniversaries of our holy union to celebrate

for me to know that 3 years ago on our anniversary I surprised her with the Rfamily cruise

and that one present would change the course of our live forever

do you ever wonder where you will be in 13 yrs, 10 or even 5yrs?

I do – and maybe way too often

I was not going to speak at SU Law School this coming Monday,  but it may be the right thing to do,

but now I have to push the darkness far – far away and see if there is light that I can impart to those students

that there are reasons to fight for equilty and the battle looks like it will be long, difficult and painful –

more painful than I think I can bare – but I guess only my higher being knows that answer


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